A dear friend of mine passed away last Sunday.

Travis was my husband's college roommate. He was the best man at our wedding and he is our son's godfather. Although he started out just being my husband's friend, somewhere along the way in the last eight years be became my friend as well.

Travis' death was very sudden. Even after having been to his funeral, I still can't quite believe he's gone. I mean, he was 34 years old, strong and healthy. How do things like this happen?

At Travis' service, the minister asked people to stand and share stories. A million things went through my mind, but I couldn't do it. I knew if I started saying things out loud I was going to start crying and I feared I might never be able to stop.

Travis' service was in Evansville, so my husband and I had a lot of time to think on the way home. I kicked myself over and over for not saying what I should have in tribute to my friend.

So I will do it here.

My friend Travis was tremendous in every way. Not only was he large in stature, he also had a huge heart, more compassion than anyone I have ever known and a seemingly endless supply of understanding. He would never hold slights against anyone ... in the entire time I knew him, I can't remember Travis ever saying anything about those who had wronged him. He was forgiving, sometimes to a fault, and would do anything he could to help others. If he didn't have what you needed, it seemed he could always find a way to get it for you, and he did.

Travis loved children, animals, nature and music. Although he never had any children of his own, he doted on his stepchildren, his nephew and my son.

I think it is a shame that he never had a baby of his own, but he would say it didn't matter because he had enough kids in his life to love.

Travis was an amazing drummer. He could do rock, folk, jazz, blues ... he was awesome. I can remember watching him play and just being mesmerized by him. He was self-taught, I think ... I believe the only direction he ever had was through being a member of his high school band.

I think what I will miss the most about Travis (aside from his hugginess ... for being a big, tough guy, he was surprisingly tender in a lot of ways) is the way he made me feel about myself. Whenever I would screw up (and I'm going to be honest, I screw up a lot), I would call him, cry and tell him what a loser I was.

He would tell me I wasn't a loser, that I was human, and then we would talk and figure out a way to fix things.

I think this is one of those things that I may get past, but I will never get over.

Travis, my friend, I'm sorry I couldn't get up and speak about you. But always know that I love you and not a day will go by when I don't remember you and miss you.