It seems more devious than sacrilegious that during the hottest stretch of summer, the gang at the old Farmers' Almanac would get all folksy on us and start yammering about what horrors await us again this winter.
I mean, can't we even enjoy our 90-degree days? Enjoy our 100-percent humidity sweatfest here without getting all nostalgic for ice, snow and cold and a visit from the Polar Vortex?
The only thing icy cold that should be grabbing headlines right now is the ubiquitous Ice Bucket Challenge. (Yes, I'm still holding out ...).
Believe me, I understand the virtues of juxtaposition when you're making a point.
After all, my furnace went out on the coldest day of the year last winter. And now my car's air conditioning is producing nothing but hot air, just in time for the annual Indiana Humidity Festival.
My point? Life sucks.
Yay, I'm already quite tired of hearing how the Farmers' Almanac is predicting yet another nasty round of winter. Bah, humbug!
Yes, the almanac did offer a dire prediction about last winter, getting it right while all the other weather guessers called it wrong.
High-fives for the almanac guys.
But wasn't it really just the law of averages catching up to them?
Don't they always predict snowier and colder than normal for the Midwest?
Haven't they been predicting snow and cold every winter since the Chicago Cubs last won a World Series?
Which is exactly my point. Somewhere out there is a guy who year in and year out predicts the Cubs will finally win the World Series. He's going to be right sooner or later ... isn't he? OK, maybe sometime ...
So here comes the 198-year-old almanac predicting more of the same for winter 2014-15.
"Shivery and shovelry are back," managing editor Sandi Duncan suggests. "We're calling for some frigid conditions, bitter conditions."
Yep, and I'm predicting sunny and warm conditions for San Diego.
The latest edition of the almanac, going on sale this week, forecasts colder-than-normal and wetter-than-usual weather for three-quarters of the country east of The Rockies.
Readers are encouraged to be prepared and to make the best of it.
"When it snows," Duncan quipped, "you have two choices: Shovel or make snow angels."
Come to think of it, I guess you can't do that with Hoosier humidity.